Monday, August 31, 2009

WELL, WELL, WELL.....LOVE DOES IN FACT PREVAIL!!! read the title right! For all the naysayers out there, I'm here to tell you that I've been made a believer again in the one thing that I had become numb to...L-O-V-E!

I know, I know...if you're a regular follower of my blog you've had the uncanny experience of reading of my past relationship tales. As a matter of fact, one of my last blog posts (some months ago) had me all but swearing off men forever because my last (brief) relationship took me right back to the same place about men that I was at before my 2-yr hiatus from dating. After all, that experience was a grim reminder why I took a 2-yr hiatus in the 1st place. That relationship once again proved to me that staying single for the rest of my life was my destiny.
But then just when I least expected it, I met someone who over the course of the past 4 months has completely refuted & dismissed every notion I ever had about that little 4-letter word & relationships of my past. I guess it's true what they say, 'love will find you when you least expect it'. Maybe that was part of my dilemma in the was never finding me. Or maybe I was just a magnet for the wrong guy to find me. No matter how you look at it, this relationship completely caught me off guard.

My favorite social networking site, Facebook, was the place where I met "Mr. Wonderful"...(please stay with need to grow nauseous...just yet anyway...). I received a friend request from him in December of last year. His credentials stated he was someone I attended high school with, but in the far reaches of my mind, I couldn't place him. His good looks alone was enough to make me add him....(as that was all I had to go on at that time). We exchanged brief hellos & emails by way of Facebook here & there. We even chatted some inbetween. He seemed like a nice guy but outside of his good looks, pleasant demeanor, & deep intellect, I had nothing more to go on. Early on following one of our chat sessions, I had this sensation that told me that somewhere down the road, something would occur between he & I but just wasn't sure what. It wasn't a thought I studied or lost sleep over. I put it out of my mind & continued onward.

This type of interaction between us continued for several months following my acceptance of his friend request. Then one day, the tides began to turn. For fun, he posted a pic from his high school days on his profile & turned it into a fun little quiz. The 1st person who could name when & where the pic was taken would win a free Starbucks. All I needed to see was the word Starbucks & I was on it like white on rice!! And ironically (or maybe no so much so) I was the winner of said Starbucks!
We set up our chance meeting at our local Starbucks. Mind you, it is only fair to add that I never for one second thought he was serious about actually awarding a prize to the 'lucky' person who won the quiz. But he made good on his promise. And little did I know what would then unfold between us following.

Four months later, I've been made a believer in love again. Suffice it to say, before Andy I 'thought' I knew what love was. Heck, I even thought I'd 'found' it a time or two. It wasn't until meeting Andy that all my previous ideas & notions about love & relationships were blown right out of the water.
Being with Andy is something like right out of a movie. Each day feels like we're on the big screen watching our lives unfold magically before us. He is everything I have ever dreamed of, hoped for, searched for & believed existed. My previous relationships put a damper on my true inner beliefs about love & relationships to be sure. But now I have a real understanding of why things happened the way they did before him. Why my other relationships failed & for that matter, why those who graced my life did so. I was being prepared for Andy. My 2-yr hiatus was all part of it too. I had to go through everything with the others in my life to get to where I was meant to be & who I was meant to be with. Everything fits together now. He is the missing piece that I've been searching for.

I look back on my life & time before Andy, and I silently chuckle inside to myself. I had gotten to a point where I all but swore off men forever. I was content being happily single the rest of my life. Men had proven to be anything but a positive in my life. Why not just stay single? I had more success it seemed as a single woman than a 'taken' one. I refused to ever sell myself short for the sake of having a relationship ever again. I would just 'wait it out' & live my life in the meantime. And that is what I did for 2 yrs.

But Andy came along & literally swept me off my feet...truly before I even knew what was happening. You'd have to know Andy. He's not a charmer or player. He wasn't someone looking for a 'good time'. But what he is undoubtedly is the best thing to ever happen to me. He's kind, gentle, loving, considerate, compassionate, honest, and a real modern day knight in shining armor. I've never experienced a love so real before. He's exactly the kind of man I've referred to in previous blogs that women look for & want in their lives. He doesn't have 'man drama'. He knows exactly who he is and what he stands for. He's true to himself, his beliefs, and makes each day with him a true journey that reminds me exactly what life is all about. Most importantly, he comes from good stock...meaning he was raised & taught how to treat a woman by seeing the example set by his own father growing up. You have to admire a man who in this day & time isn't afraid to be sensitive, old fashioned, a true gentleman, & looks to his past experiences of upbringing to be his guiding hand in everything he does. Andy is the 'real-life' version of what every woman yearns for when they watch their favorite big-screen romance. Chivalry is certainly not dead with Andy. He loves much so...that he embraces each day to the fullest. It's his passion to give all he has to me...not materially...but from within. He doesn't hold back but truly has allowed me to see time & again inside his heart & soul. I tend to be pretty philosophical & feel I have a good grasp on the meaning of life...but I've learned since meeting Andy that even I have room for improvement in many areas. He inspires me & motivates me to be the very best I can be every day. Life with him is a true journey. I can barely remember the time before him when I was completely resigned to remaining single for the rest of my life.

I've always heard you just 'know' when you find the right one. Like many other notions I had about love, I found myself scoffing at that...(especially given my past relationships). But I fully understand what that means now. I did 'know' almost from the get-go with Andy that he was 'the guy'. I can't explain how I knew but I just knew. There's a huge difference in knowing something & wishing & hoping for it. There was never a question of whether or not Andy was the one. There have never been any doubts. Now I can't imagine living the rest of my life without Andy, especially when it feels like he's been a part of it forever.

So this is what the 'real thing' feels like. I'm truly blessed because undoubtedly God had a hand in all of this. There was a plan. Despite my misgivings about relationships, I never gave up on love. Perhaps that is the very reason why God has given me this wonderful gift of a man who is in my life now. God never wants us to settle for mediocrity and I stood firm in waiting forever if that is what it took so as never to sell myself short in the love department ever again. Not only did I win a Starbucks that day back in April, but I won so much more. Andy is far greater a man than I could have ever envisioned, dreamed of or asked for in my wildest dreams. I pinch myself every day to make sure I'm not dreaming. When the sting of the pinch becomes real I know I'm not. Dreams do come true & can be played out in real life...just like on the big screen.